Reservations

I'm standing on my bed.

Ι open my arms.

I dive in the air of the room.

The ceiling opens like a can.

I can see the sky now.

I fly outside and the light of the sun blinds me.

I swim in the blue sky.

I'm coming to pick you up.

Get ready.I don't like to wait.

I'll take you out today.

I made a reservation.

The world is waiting for us to discover it.

About loneliness and solitude

There's a difference between loneliness and solitude.
Loneliness is feeling that something is missing.
Solitude is being alone and enjoying it.
Peace of mind,inner search,refreshing yourself.


Solitude is something you choose. Loneliness is imposed on you by others.


So don't be afraid of being alone,little creature of mine.Don't be afraid of silence,of facing yourself. 
You can run away for ever if you want.But you'll have to be deaf.Not to listen to yourself breathing.
But remember.After remaining in the dark for more than 3 minutes,everything seem less frightening.
Your eyes adjsust to the dark.

My baby,my camera is not working.
And my relationship with mum is not working.
And  my emotions are not really working.
I'm not working for sure.
Maybe some sunbathing could fix me.Or not.
Don't care.Some sunbathing is all I want right now.

About growing old and peeing in the sea

Sick as I was I stayed at home today.My mum stayed at home too.She was worried.
Not about me.About our cat.
He doesn't feel very well these days.
Grandma came too.
She is not that good either.
And we were sitting,three generations of women together.
Me,my mum,my grandma.And my cat.
Grandma and the cat were sitting,with distant eyes,in silence.
Mum was preparing tea for both of us.
Grandma was staring at me for a while,but I wasn't sure she was actually looking at me.
I wish I knew what was going on in her head.
But she's semi-deaf and my throat hearts when I speak.
Mum told me she wishes she'll never be in my grandmas' condition.
My mother acts as if she were her mother's mother.
And the weather was perfect outside.
And I was thinking about the other day.
How we both didn't admit what we really feel.
Like peeing in the sea.
No one admits it.
But I don't believe there's a single one who has never done it.
Personally,I love it.
My mum is growing older.
But you know what they say.
We don't stop playing because we grow old;we grow old because we stop playing.

Now that we're open up,

are you sure you wanna come in?

She turned to see.
I instantly hid what I was writing with my fingers.
She barged into my personal space.
She looked inside.
She saw me naked.
Exposed.
If I open up to people?
I open up to those who are willing to tame me.

“To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world.…”

-The little prince

The weather was better today.
Too much drama.

I was a heavy heart to carry

I'm filled with disgust for myself these days.
Even now.
That I talk about me again.
Me,me,me.
Like I am the center of the universe.
And there's no place in this universe where I can hide from myself.
Myself is haunting me.
And I want to stop talking for a while.
Just to hear.
Maybe then,in the silence,myself will come closer to me.
And whisper in my ears what he wants me to do.
And I write and write and write,but I always erase it.
'Cause everything I write,irritates me.
Spring come to me,please.

All these things left unsaid

And we were lying on the grass today.
It was cloudy but the sun was burning my cheeks.
And we nuzzle up to each other.
Trying to open our soul to each other.
But being afraid at the same time.
And it's a war.
And the first one who will touch on all the things we don't dare to touch,is the weak one,the loser.
We are just some little vulnerable creatures.
Afraid to get hurt.
When I like a song I'm not thinking I shouldn't listen to it again and again,not to get bored of it,he said.
Do I want to hold his hand or to be holden by the hand?
Do I want to lie on his chest or to lie on a chest?
Do I want him to hug me or me to be hugged?
We are just some little creatures.

Animal insticts

I should never forget this.
So many things can change in a few days.
The best will always be the next portal.
"What would you like to be?" he asked me.
"What?Anything?"
"Yes."
"To be me.With wings"
And this.And that.
Everything.I want them all.
My animal insticts.
And I don't feel guilty for that.
It feels so good to roll in the mud.
We are what I always wanted us to be (?)
When was the last time you cried?What's the last thing you think before you fall asleep?Ιs it you the picture you see in the mirror every morning?
People are afraid of what there is inside.


There is never nothing going on.This moment is the only thing that matters.

Who are all these people?

Eating huge amounts of sandwitches with cheese and curry while wanting to lose weight.

Feeling like I'm on a supermarket trolley and someone else is driving me.

Wanting to get closer but being afraid at the same time.

Like the stray cat wants to eat the food on the human's hand,but her wild insticts don't let her do so.

Hearing him saying he wants to drink my tears once more.

But I'm not feeling like crying for the first time.'Cause the sun's shinning.

Watching people coming and leaving.Dancing.Kissing me.Then leaving again.

Staying for a little.Then leaving again.Chasing me.

Watching people coming and leaving in my life.

Feeling like a numb observer once again.

I don't care about all these people.

As long as I have her in my life.

The one I care for.

The one that cheers me up.

The one we cry together simply by looking each other.

Mind on crisis

Dear Brain of mine,

What's wrong with you?
Can you please explain me why you refuse to cooperate with me?
You think it's funny playing games with me?
I assume you it's not.
I feel that our relationship is on crisis.
Ok.I admit I didn't take care of you the last days.
I wasn't sleeping enough and I was avoiding to challenge you.
But is this a reason to leave me when I mostly need you?

Up there

We were just lying in the grass.
Away from this city.
We could barely hear its hum from up there.
We were closer to the sky.
Closer to anything devine.
It was us.
And them.
But still.We weren't one.
We were two single entities.
He was right next to me but I was still feeling lonely.
And now I wonder more than ever before.
Will I ever feel full?

My skin

My skin is nothing else but a thin plastic membrane

that keeps a torrent of emotions from rushing out.

And drowning the world.

I'm the earth.

My ground is craving for your water.
I'm the earth.
And I blossom with every step of yours.
My heart is beating in the rhythm of your steps.
But you fly away.
You distance from my surface.
And you leave me behind.
Waiting patiently for your landing.
Υou will get tired of flying,somewhen.
And you will look for me again.
You will lie down and kiss respectfully my ground.
And my heart will start beating again in the music of your breath.
And your breath is blending with the atmosphere.
And fondles my ears.